Sunday, May 8, 2011

Baby Momma

Today, I learned something that may prove to be important in my future.
Are you ready for it?

I can unhook and reclasp my strapless bra on a different setting... WHILE DRIVING. (Not that I did that, copper, because it would be a very dangerous maneuver to perform while driving, I'm quite sure.)

Yup. I'm pretty much a BAMF.

Tomorrow (officially today, if you're going for technicalities) is Mother's Day. The one day of the year we set aside to celebrate our mothers and other people who are mothers that are dear to us.

I try to celebrate my mother every day.

I fail.

But that's not the point.

Every day I find a reason that I am thankful for my mom. Every day I tell her I love her. Every day I wonder where I would be now or what I would do without her.

My mom is the one I want to talk to when I spend too much time around other people. She is so much a part of me that she doesn't count as one of them. My mom is the one who teases me about going out with people and tells me I don't need to do things, then wants to know every detail practically as soon as I get home that night.

She has been at every important point in my life. When I lost my first tooth trying to bite into a frozen cookie to get the cream filling out of the middle. When junior high became cruel. When my first love broke my heart and she held me in her lap in the rocking chair as I cried and cried (I was sixteen, by the way). Even the exodus from my first apartment-- or, as she dubbed it, my first quasi-divorce.

She is my friend. My confidant. My lifesaver.

There are so many women (and men, but today is about the ladies) that I am incredibly thankful for and lucky to have in my life.

Some of them are friends, some sisters, and some "second mothers." I love each of them deeply.

But not one of them can compare to the woman who, exactly 24 years ago, felt me moving in her womb.

For, like, two more weeks.

I needed some space to spread out, yo.

Mom, I love you more than words can really say.

Maybe one day, when you finally give in and read this, you'll realize exactly how much that is.

Happy Mother's Day.

To my mom, your mom, and you.


  1. Mothers really are awesome. I just think that greeting card companies support and promote this holiday for their own personal gain. For all I know, Mother's Day could have been created for the sole purpose for Hallmark to sell more musical greeting cards. I do like the sound they make, but I feel like a consumer whore after buying them. I will admit, I do not feel guilty about buying a box of chocolates; their delicious caramel cream filled morsels are like a organism in my mouth. Sure people might complain about a holiday, but who gives a fuck when chocolate is involved.

    So what should I do for Mother's Day? I could:
    A. Take my mother out for dinner.
    B. Buy my mom something (chocolates, fancy soaps, novelty items)
    C. Do both A and B
    D. Be a horrible daughter/son and not do any of this.

    Obviously C is the best option, which I plan to do. I hope you have a Happy Mother's Day. :) On a final note; you are quite talented.

  2. Very sweet entry. I hope your mom sees this!

  3. Agh, chocolate is my kryptonite. Seriously. I'm more okay with holidays like Mother's and Father's Day than I am with, say, Secretary's Day (and I'm a secretary). Mostly because my mom works really hard every day and this is pretty much the only day she really feels she should be entitled to rest. My parents are also awesome and I like recognizing their awesomeness.

    Patty, she'll see it someday, I'm sure. I think right now she's still to afraid to read my blog. Which is weird, I think, since she already knows most of the stuff I write about anyway. And is no longer surprised by my swearing.