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Sunday, April 13, 2014

Belly of Fire.

In the last month or so I've been having a lot more problems with acid reflux than I have for the last two years or so.  I think it's mainly stress-induced because I've been thinking a lot about what I have to do before graduation and also about what I need to do before moving this summer.  And how much moving this summer is going to suck.

I'm pretty sure the stress is exacerbated by the fact that I often will wait until later than I should to eat, mostly because Yoshi is getting home late and I want to eat with him but sometimes also because I don't like sharing the kitchen during prime cooking times so I'll just hide in my room.

Friday night was pretty much the end of me being able to eat whatever I want whenever I want.

I didn't eat for too long and the first thing I had after a four-ish hour gap between snack and meal was some In-N-Out french fries that I stole from Yoshi's pre-work meal.  Then I had some quinoa guacamole and didn't eat for several more hours.

The rest of the night was mildly unpleasant, to say the least, and I, once again, had to sleep sitting up in bed.

Yesterday I didn't eat much; crackers, some pretzel bites, and a bean and cheese burrito from Dos Coyotes.  But of course it was the day that I had planned to go recital dress shopping in Sacrameto, so I got to look forward to that car ride for a little bit.  But I made it through with minimal trauma.

I've been scouring Pinterest for ideas on what I should do about my stomach problems for about 24 hours and I've reached the definitive conclusion that I don't get to eat anything delicious ever again.  All the reflux articles agreed on cutting out the same foods, and since I'm already working on exercising more often I think the food changes will benefit me the more than anything else I saw.

No fatty foods, especially those fried in batter and delicious oil.  Or no batter.  Apparently that's just as bad.  I guess it's a good thing I am now an expert on oven fries because I'm not sure how to live without a variety of potatoes, especially crispy slices of potato.  If I couldn't make oven fries I'd probably just lay down and die right now.

No sweets.  Especially chocolate.  No.  Chocolate.  What.  The.  Fuck.  How am I supposed to live like this?  No cake.  No cheesecake.  I don't really eat much candy, anyway.  But no chocolate.  Just kill me.  I don't need to be alive.

No coffee.  Eh.  I mean, it's delicious.  But I've been stuck drinking decaf for like five years and now I just don't let myself drink this sweet nectar of the gods because I know how my stomach is going to react already and it's not going to be well.  It's going to be painful.

No soda.  I mean...  I don't really drink soda anymore anyway.  Occasionally I have a Sprite or carbonated water, and more often than not it's because I don't know where I last left the Alka Seltzer so I'm drinking carbonated water instead for a temporary fix.  Any soda that's not clear sets me off.  Anything with caffeine sets me off.  But if it didn't hurt my tummy so much I would probably still love to have a Coke every now and then.  I used to love Coke.

No spicy food.  Seriously, just kill me.  I haven't been able to consume raw jalapeƱos since I was 20 and I hate it because they are so completely delicious.  Now I can't even eat bell peppers half the time.

This is basically just a list of everything I love to eat most.  But now am unable to consume because my stomach is failing to do it's job properly.

I actually started this blog intending to talk about how my cat got on my bed this morning with poop stuck to his leg and I had to cut it out, but then I got very caught up in how completely pissed off I am that I no longer can eat funnel cake or french fries without my stomach tossing up a middle finger of molten lava.

Just kill me now.