Frustration.

This weekend I saw The Dark Knight Rises (and it was fucking amazing), took an awesome nap, and went on a couple hikes.  The Alaskan wilderness is beautiful.

However, I've been living in a two-bed dorm room with a shared bathroom for the last week.  My ankles are covered in mosquito bites.  I'm tired as hell because I can't get normal sleep between the 24-construction and the itty twin bed in which I'm sleeping.

Above all, I'm fed up with my summer program.  It's not at all worth the money that I had to spend to do it and I'm really frustrated.  I either don't have anything to do or I'm expected to follow directions that were either not given clearly or not given at all.  If I don't I get yelled at.  If I do sometimes I get shoved out of the way.

I've been here a week and I'm ready to go back home already.

I just have to get through this to prove to myself that I can.  If not, why bother performing?

Dorm Life.

I'm currently finishing day three of the seventeen I'll be here in Alaska.  So far it's pretty much amazing.

The weather has been cool but not overly humid.  We've already had a good mix of generally nice weather with some light rain.

I arrived before 1:30 AM and as our flight from Seattle worked its way along the Pacific edge of Canada I actually got to watch the sun rise again sometime around midnight from my window seat.  I took what pictures I could through the airplane window, so I'll have to post them when I am able.

Four of the five other students from my university arrived within the same few hours as me and, after checking into our dorm rooms, none of us were tired.  The thrill of being in the 49th state, mixed with the ability to safely wander through a perfectly well-lit town at 2:30 in the morning, made us restless.

Also, the airline lost my luggage and I had to go buy a toothbrush.  We were also all very hungry, so we got a taxi driver to take the five of us through the Taco Bell drive-through, which was pretty much the only thing open.

Noon is still the brightest time of day and sometime between midnight and two or three in the morning is darkest.  Which is still not actually dark; it's more like twilight.  The sun pretty much stays just under the horizon all "night".  And in the daytime it doesn't get as high in the sky as it does in California.

I'm sharing a double room in the dormitories with one of my very close friends and things are working out really well with that.  We share the floor with the other students from our school and a couple others from the same program.  There's one big bathroom (eight or so toilets and about six showers) on the floor.  I think it's technically the ladies' room during the year, but we're college students and we just don't give a shit.  So we share and it seems to work.  There are a couple older women on the floor who were surprised the first few times they saw the young guys wandering around in there after a shower, but I think they're recovering well.

We're within walking distance to most things.  I'm using walking distance in sort of a loose sense here.  Fred Meyer, for instance, is the best place for us to go get groceries and other supplies.  It is also almost exactly two miles from the dorms.  So it's a good thing I brought good walking shoes.  My legs have been sore for what seems like forever.  There are also a lot of hills and such around the university here.  I just figure I need the exercise, so nearly every time someone goes into town (basically, down the hill from the school) I find myself offering to join them.  It's easier to comprehend walking when you're somewhere that isn't 105 degrees outside, I promise.


My favorite things about Alaska thus far:

1--It is absolutely gorgeous.  Like even more beautiful than "Into The Wild" led me to believe, and that movie made everything seem pretty awesome.  It's ridiculous and almost annoying.  I'm glad I got to experience it for the first time not only during summer, but right in the middle of July when it's warmest and everything is at its most lush.

2--These are some of the nicest people I've ever met in my entire life.  All of them.  There's only one person I've encountered in the last three days who wasn't very friendly (he's the cashier for the liquor counter in Fred Meyer, which, by the way, has an AMAZING liquor section) and even he is still nice.  Everyone is polite and helpful and courteous.

We talked to a man outside one of the bars on Saturday night (bars here don't close until 3:30 on the weekend) about things to do on the cheap in the area and Sunday we ran into him in Fred Meyer.  Not only did he recognize us, but he actively sought us out to say hello and see how we were doing.  He said people move away and move back because they miss the other people who live here and the general attitude so much.

I could almost live here.  If I ever get sick of California, it's either here or Seattle.

Or Europe.

But that's my "in case of wealthiness" plan.

On A Jet Plane.

In 23 hours I will be getting on my first plane in the last decade to fly to Seattle, and from Seattle to Fairbanks.  In approximately 28 hours I will be in Alaska.  

I'm pretty much crapping myself with excitement right now.  

On the other hand, my music is barely learned, I have yet to pack, and I am starting to feel inadequate because I'm so anxious.  So, we'll see how this goes.  

My boss recommended I buy copious amounts of liquor on the plane.  To him I say: noted, sir.  Noted.

"Gift" Horse.

I've been waiting three days for my period to start.  When it finally did I just thought I had to poop, so I was somehow surprised.  I hate it when that happens.

I started thinking, though, that if I find menstruating as annoying as I do, how annoying and uncomfortable is it for others?  More specifically, pre-op F to M transgenders.

If I identified as a male I would probably try to ignore my lady bits as much as possible.  Therefore, Mother Nature's monthly gift would kind of be a slap in the face.  For up to a week every month you get to deal with the mess from the little reminder that you are indeed one of the most magnificent things on the Earth: a woman.

So, that probably sucks.

I think bleeding is probably at least an equally devastating slap in the face to women trying to become mothers.  Women on all kinds of hormones and fertility drugs who are putting their psyche, body, and (probably) family through hell all for the slightest chance that they might become one step closer to conceiving a child.  Women who will try anything, even fucking upside down and walking on their hands for the next hour.

Or even women who have managed to conceive only for their bodies to reject the fetus.

Women who cry every time those first drops of blood line their undergarments.

I guess I should consider myself lucky that my biggest worry right now is being late for no reason.

Douche Theory.

Do people still douche?  Is that still a thing?

I've always been under the impression that you shouldn't do it and I just figured it was one of those things like shaving; once you start doing it you have to keep doing it or the symptoms that made you start doing it in the first place keep coming back worse than they started out.  Like how you start out with the fine blonde hair on your legs and shaving makes it seem all prickly and dark and weird.

I keep seeing advertisements for a vaginal pH balancing cream and one of the times the ad recommended use was after douching.  So...  Maybe if you don't douche you don't have to spend the money on the pH balancing cream?  Or the douche?

Just a thought.

Maybe I'm just super minimalist when it comes to my lady parts.

Less fuss, less problems.

If nothing weird goes in, then nothing weird comes out.